Friday, September 5, 2008

My Take On McCain's Acceptance Speech...


Ok...So I didn't actually watch McCain's acceptance speech, I read the transcript. But my SparkNotes version of what McCain said is as follows:

I am a victim, a dedicated if imperfect servant of my country, not perfected until I realized that the State is far more important than I am, I love peace, I hate war, I will wage war, I will smite the Muslims, I will kill the Russians, I will strike down anyone who fails to bow the knee to me, I will drill, I will build nuclear power plants, I will care for the jobless, the homeless, the bankrupt, the sick, the oil men, the bankers, the arms merchants, the soldiers, the lobbyists; I was a POW, I bear the scars of Jesus on my body, I was wounded, I was hurt, I was crippled, I was jailed, I was tortured, I was imprisoned, I was gaoled, I was in captivity, I was behind bars, I was held against my will, except when I decided to stay, I told nothing, I told nothing, I told everything, country first, country first, freedom, low taxes, I will stand at your side, not in front of you, world empire, everything for the State, nothing outside the State, nothing against the State, hail me, hail me, hail me.

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